This must be how it happens...

You know how those people always say that you have kids, then blink and they're 18? The past few weeks sort of showed me how that might happen. Except he's still such a total baby. Blink. Still not working...

I dyed my hair blue. I wanted two chunks of blue under the top layer and it's pretty cool that way. Except that, the hair around the blue seems to have picked up some of the dye and is now sort of a peacocky green. But mostly it's cool.

I'm also thinking of getting a tattoo. I am not kidding. Geeky classical musician by day, geeky classical musician with freaky blue-green hair and a tat by night. I got stretch marks, see. A little map of somewhere european with lots of twisty streets has appeared around my navel. It reminds me of these patterns in an old fallen tree we took pictures of on Mount Hood. I am not the kind of girl who bares her navel anyway, making it an eyes-only sort of region. So if I chicken out you will never know, ha-ha, unless you are the 87% of my readership known as "J".

Let's see...

In other news, Tobias has continued to grow. He weighs 15 pounds now- at least, he did 3 days ago. By now it's likely up around 50. Despite this he often requires me to carry him in my arms through miles of Target aisles. He disdains the car seat because he runs the risk of getting Bored there. Apparently, the view is radically different than laying directly in front of me like a prince surrounded by toys and a crazy lady repeating "Doot doot. DOOOt doot doot! Dooooo de doo." while smily wildly and trying to offer the pacifier in a manner deemed acceptable.

We have a similar scenario in the car. All is happy coos or contented snoring while the vehicle is in motion. But God forbid we encounter a red light, an old lady walkering across the street or any other reason to stop for even the briefest of moments. He has this internal sensor hooked up to his Holy Crap alarm, and danged if it doesn't go off daily. J and I both are experts at that most annoying of driving habits where we seem to stop about 15 feet before it's even remotely necessary, then slooowwwly creep forward. The more the car vibrates, the better. Thank goodness it's a stick and has a tranny issue.

As I typed, his royal heiny was cooing and squeeling delightfully ("AhhEEEeeyah...HaiiIIIiii"...and so on.) on his specially designed Gymini baby mat. Operative word: was. I knew we were headed downhill when he started that tried 'n true cry warm-up, " a-HUH!...a-HUH!" with an award winning scowl complete with down-turned drooly mouth.

Now, sadly, I tire of one-handed breastfeeder typing so we'll have to chat more later. Ta-ta. (get it?)

Today: AKA The Very Last Time

..we will ever move without paying whatever it takes to whoever will do it for us.

Let's assemble a fruit basket.

I know a woman named Pear
and another named Apricot.
Gwyneth has introduced us all to her daughter, Apple.


Got any more?

Leader of the Free (flowing) World

A geyser, a rainbird, a showerhead.

Why do you do this, trigger the sprinkler system and then leave the building?

All the world will be saturated, wet, milky scented.

They will look upon my chest and tremble.

Your fingers flexing with restrained benevolence, you smile while your dinner flows around the spout down your several chins flooding the earth and its inhabitants.

You'd think, Tobias, that since you're so danged good at growing it would follow that you'd be proficient at eating as well.

(PS- I promise to stop posting exclusively about momliness soon.)

Now we are six (weeks).

Tomorrow marks the completion of Tobias' sixth week on the outside. I remember looking ahead to this milestone like I was in base camp and it was a staging area for the summit. The summit being all sorts of things:

*sleeping in lengths both generous and nocturnal, lengths allowing me to feel the need to brush my teeth less than 8 times a day, lengths which prompt the phrase "went to bed at...". Hmmm, this is a work in progress, but he's generally throwing me a bone with one long sleep per day and he hasn't slipped backward from the 3 hour minimums lately, so of course I love him more. Sleep = Loved Baby, see.

*personality, interaction. We have a drummer friend from church who said the first few months are designed to help us understand God. You know, pursuing us even though we don't respond with love at first, our needing everything from him, rejecting him blindly when things get tough, crying out in all directions, not knowing what exactly would fix us. Tobias is waking up to himself every day. And you know, it does make it easier to perform these mom-tasks. He now laughs/smiles not only at us but at inanimate objects. He has been testing out his voice- yesterday he made that trilling Rrrrr sound people use as a pick-up in B movies. Men sure start young these days...

*I figured by six weeks I might know what kind of mom I'd be. Hahahaha. Wasn't I cute, silly enormous pregnant Miriam. I still don't really know- maybe by the time he's 18? Maybe by the time he has kids?

*I also assumed by six weeks I'd know whether PPD would be on my horizon, in light of past bouts of mild depression. So far I'm only my average amount of mentally ill.


Mostly at this point I am trying not to be a nervous, tense mom. Tobias is hands-down the most fabulous thing I've ever seen, and every day I have to remind myself to just enjoy him. Drink it all in. It makes crying, squirming, waking-up-early moments so much easier. It makes me feel I'm approaching ready to do the next six weeks- THREE MONTH OLD GENIUS, here we come.