Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Times they are a'changin


I know this isn't our adoption blog, but there comes a point where it is impossible to really separate these parts of my life.

This is a picture of the girl we might or might not have as our daughter in the near future. We're just waiting for word from her state workers as to how her parents are doing on their caseplans.

I am more and more apprehensive, I have to admit. As this pregnancy progresses, I wonder how we'll do with 2 newbies at once. Selfishly, I wonder about how this will effect my playing- something I was already wondering about the DIY baby.

There have been a few folks in our lives who have not been as excited about adoption, and while I know their intentions are pure and their thoughts run toward our protection, it's sometimes hard to know how to respond. It's hard to explain that I feel a certain parental defensiveness of a kid who is not yet and might never be truly ours. This is further complicated by the fact that we most likely will adopt at some point, so the antiquated opinions they express are about one of our children. Like a mom I met recently said, the kid "was" adopted- a monumental event in her life, and now she's just her kid. You'd be surprised the number of folks who would actually think like Royal Tenenbaum: "this is my adopted daughter, Margot".

Anyway, I felt disingenuous pretending it's possible to segregate my life into adoption/unleaded, and this is what is going through my beady little brain today.

We're off to the Aumsville toddler spa for a few days. I'll try to drag myself down to the coffee-wifi hotspot at some point. It'll be rough, but I'd do that for you, and for Nabllaehriarh training.

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