Friday, January 12, 2007

Total recall

I worry.

We are shopping for the next carseat for Toby as he's eating his way out of his current one. That means reading lots of boring stuff in consumer reports and at epinions.com, and then- exactly as in those lame insurance ads- there will be some anecdote about somebody's kid getting hurt, maybe worse. Or they'll throw in a sentence about how in their test of the Evenflo Discovery the seat separated from the base and flew 30 feet from the vehicle in their lab. They are actually having to argue with the NHTSA about recalling that monumental piece of engineering. Screw you, Evenflo. (I am doing all sorts of spitting this week. I'm on a kick.)

My questions: Is carseat design really rocket science? Isn't the WHOLE enchilada about things staying put and generally not flying, ever? Don't the designers all start off with the same degrees and the same materials? Why is the US behind Europe here?

I mean, snowboarders and bunji jumpers are wallowing in all kinds of safety gear these days. You can hardly get into any extreme sport without finding tons of brilliant inventions protecting your shrivelled, fearless little noggin. I believe the children are our future... Gah, that'll be in my head for a while.

I would like to propose a big, ugly carseat with its own rollcage and possibly lightshow. I bet it would sell because if you have any income at all and have spawned a helpless little tiny baby you feel compelled to do the right thing just in case.

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